It is quarter past 5 in the morning and today is the day. All jokes aside now, the fear is really setting in. It comes in waves, and dumps me. I want to say…. I don’t want to do this anymore. Let me please just pack up and go home…. People say I am brave, but …
The “day” is here. This afternoon I am due at the hospital to prepare for the operation tomorrow. Well, I presume the operation is tomorrow, as I really have no idea what is happening. I must say it feels like there is this big “black hole” waiting for me after lunch today. I have wondered …
The “day” is here. This afternoon I am due at the hospital to prepare for the operation tomorrow. Well, I presume the operation is tomorrow, as I really have no idea what is happening. I must say it feels like there is this big “black hole” waiting for me after lunch today. I have wondered …
When I looked in the mirror when I first got out of bed this morning, all I could think was, oh lordy I have turned into “Thing 1” or possibly “Thing 2”. my hair (if you can still call it that) with the purple in the front stood straight up in the air and I …
Why are we so obsessed with our hair. What is it about our crowning glory that when it starts to disappear we do whatever it takes to pretend it’s not leaving us. How often have you seen someone in the street with a “Comb Over” and thought “oh god just let it go”. Surely their vanity …
Results time has come an gone. The relief to hear that the tumour has not grown, and no cancer has shown up outside of the pancreas was huge. To be told that it had shrunk (retracted) “somewhat” and I was being sent back to the surgeon to see if it had retracted enough for surgery …
I went and had my hair cut yesterday, not that there was a lot to cut. But in an effort to try to make it look thicker, I thought I would get it cut short. If I had lost it all, then it would be easy to wear wigs or scarves. The family keeps telling …
So this is the last of the 6 sessions of Chemo. Thank goodness. Chemo is horrid, the toll it has taken physically as well as mentally is huge. But as I have wanted to be treated as normal as possible, I hide the pain, the nausea, the vomiting, the diarrhea, the headaches, the shakes, the …
How many of you have seriously contemplated your mortality? I have always joked that I am here for the long hall. You are not getting rid of me until I am in my 90”s and I will be kicking and screaming all the way. Since the beginning this journey I have intentionally not thought about …
It is the night before Christmas and the house is now quiet and gives me time to reflect on the last year. Someone commented to me the other day that 2017 had been a really shitty year for us. At first, I agreed, but tonight I have to disagree as I think about all the …
